Emmys 2011: Evan Rachel Wood

Evan Rachel Wood in Elie Saab
I am officially an Elie Saab convert as two of my very favoritest looks from the Emmys were both from the designer. One being red hot Kate Winslet's, and the other being this just screen siren glamour gown worn by Evan Rachel Wood. And, in accordance with my edict that gowns are great with sleeves, ERW had the designer add sleeves to the dress which originally was sleeveless. I've seen it both ways and the tiny cap sleeves do SO MUCH for the dress. It's kind of insane how much of an impact they made for the look. And the sometimes goth and garish ERW did just the right vintagey hair and makeup to really make this a stunner. LOVE LOVE LOVE

A

Emmys 2011: Heather Morris

I really love Heather Morris. She's one of my favorite things about Glee. [Which was totally a snore on Tuesday, don't you think? How did such a great show get so very boring so very fast?] But this look has me as confused as her character on the show. Why is her hair so high? Why does this dress make her look painfully flat? Why so many ruffles? And why oh WHY does she only have one earring on?

D

Emmys 2011: Colbie Smulders

Colbie Smulders in Alberta Ferreti
If you don't watch How I Met Your Mother, you should start immediately. The show is just hilarious and one of the major reasons is the beautiful and very funny Colbie Smulders. I feel like she doesn't get as much attention as she should. And apparently she felt the same way and decided to attend the Emmys in this gorgeous, show-stopping, grecian number from Alberta Ferreti. This was hands down one of my favorite looks of the night. The color isn't for everyone, but I think it dazzled on Miss Smulders, whose hair and makeup accented the look perfectly.

A-

Emmys 2011: Jane Krakowski

Actress Jane Krakowski gave birth around when I did, so I give her major kudos for the rocking post-baby bod, but this silver creation is just too... shiny... and boring. What do you think?

C-

Emmys 2011: Melissa McCarthy

I'm sure it is very hard to find red carpet dresses when you are a plus size actress in Hollywood. But I still don't think that's any reason to resort to designing your own, as Melissa McCarthy did. I get that you'd want sleeves to cover up problem arm fattage, but this is just a giant purple muumuu. She must have a better figure than that hidden under there, right? Or if she doesn't, she could have thrown on a corset or spanx or something to make it better. And what this sad sack of purple needs is definitely some large statement jewelry, that piddly little necklace is just throwing all the proportions off.

F

Emmys 2011: Jennifer Carpenter

Jennifer Carpenter
Why so serious, Jennifer? That sourpuss looks like someone spit in her wheaties. Oh, who am I kidding, she doesn't eat carbs. She looks like someone spit in her weird cayenne/maple syrup/hot water cleanse. But all that cayenne cleansing was worth it, that dress fits her so nicely. And while ombre hair is something I often make fun of, I really do like it on her.

B+

Emmys 2011: Cat Deeley

Cat Deeley in Monique Lhuillier
I'm pretty sure I've seen this dress before, but am much too ambivalent about it to even bother to access the EWP mental dress files to figure out where else I've seen it. So instead I will just complain about its pretty but averageness, and her really horrible messy hair. But, hey, she's just a reality tv host so she's winning just by not showing any of her lady bits. Good on you, Cat.

B-

Emmys 2011: Jane Lynch

Jane Lynch in David Meister
I love aubergine. It was my color for my wedding to Mr. EWP. So really any aubergine gown makes me very happy and bubbly and nostalgic. But I can't get totally bubbly about this David Meister dress. It just doesn't fit Jane right, and that large expanse above the neckline needs a necklace or something to fill it. But Ms. Lynch's makeup is positively to die for.

B

Emmys 2011: Paula Abdul

Paula Abdul
I never thought the day would come - Paula Abdul looks... sane! Well, in a picture at least since she can't speak. I love this blue mermaid gown with cascading ruffles. With the sparkly belt and sideswept hair, this look is positively ravishing.

A-

Emmys 2011: Julianna Margulies

Julianna Margulies in Giorgio Armani Prive
I don't understand how such a successful, beautiful woman can make SO MANY TERRIBLE red carpet choices. JM is a serial red carpet offender. I dont' think I can remember ever seeing anything she wore that didn't make me want to rip my eyes out with a seafood fork. And this white, colum, bejeweled number definitely has me reaching in my silverware drawer. [Yes, I own seafood forks. Doesn't everybody?] I'm pretty sure this was a 7 year old's craft project and she got some plastic bobbles and some glue and put this together.

F

Emmys 2011: Sarah Hyland

Sarah Hyland in Christian Siriano
Normally I would be freaking out about a teenager wearing both hooker heels and a slit up to there, but then I saw what her 13 year old co-star wore and this really is just fine to me in comparison. Still looking for a pic of that dress.

C+

Emmys 2011: Claire Danes

Claire Danes in Oscar de la Renta
The Latisse spokeswoman displayed her creepily crazy lashes along with a creepily crazy sequined gown at the Emmys. The patchwork makes her look like a hobo, more than her shilling for an eyelash growing serum already does. Are you so hard up that you had to raid the scraps bin at Mood to piece together your gown for the night? So sad.

F

Emmys 2011: Lea Michele

Lea Michele in Marchesa
Damn you, Lea. I want to hate you so much. Your ego bothers me to no end. But you make it so hard by always being such a red carpet darling. And your look at the Emmys was no exception.

Love the red. Love the column gown with a hint of train. And, good lord, LOVE LOVE LOVE those rose ruffled sleeves. I'm telling you people, sleeves on gowns are gorgeous. And a rosette ruffled sleeve is just so chic against the otherwise very simple gown. *swoon*

A+

Emmys 2011: Amy Poehler

Amy Poehler in Peter Som
A lot of the funny ladies of tv are so very smart and witty, but sadly very clueless on the red carpet. Amy is usually one of these ladies. So it was a major surprise to see Amy in such an eye-catching look. Sure, on another actress I'd call it not that great, but for Amy it's fantastic. Love the cobalt. Cobalt is just so yummy. Love the sleeve. As I've been saying, sleeves are so very chic on a gown these days. And the belt breaks up the dress so it isn't one big blob. Only problem: the material/shine. It seems rubbery. Like she's in a giant cobalt, shiny wetsuit. Ick.

B-

Emmys 2011: Sofia Vergara

Sofia Vergara in Vera Wang
Sofia Vergara is one of my major girl crushes. She's one sexy lady. I guess I have a thing for curves in my lady crushes. What can I say, I'm a breast gal. But sadly this look is just not working for me. The makeup seems harsh. The earrings don't go with the bangles. And the tulle hanging out at the bottom is just killing me. I do like the cut of the bodice. It could've been a good look but just fell short.

B-

Emmys 2011: Kate Winslet

Kate Winslet in Elie Saab
Oh daaaaaamn. Kate Winslet looks smoking hot. Seriously. The red. The cleavage. The stance. The hair. That is some in your face hotness. EWP approves.

A

Emmys 2011: Minka Kelly

Minka Kelly in Dior
Wow, Minka Kelly must be taking her breakup from Derek Jeter. That can surely be the only reason to don such a sad grandma lace curtain of a dress. Poor thing. Don't worry, Minka, you'll find someone soon.

C+

Emmys 2011: Christina Hendricks

Christina Hendricks in Johanna Johnson
Christina Hendricks doesn't seem to be able to dress her extremely curvaceous figure. I know it must be hard to get those triple ZZZs into a dress (seriously, she has the biggest breasts I've ever seen), but I know there is stuff out there that would be flattering. I mean, she looks fantastic on Mad Men on literally every single episode, so why can't she bring a little Joan to her red carpet? Something with a higher neckline? Something with rich jewel colors? Something that doesn't make her thighs look ginormous? *sigh* She really is a gorgeous woman. But I'm sorry to say she has very very poor taste.

C

Emmys 2011: Kelly Osbourne

Kelly Osbourne in J. Mendel
I've decided I love J. Mendel. And I knew I loved aubergine. So this is one winning combo. Too bad Kelly's hair is more silver fox than young fox. What a strange color. But I do love the styling and makeup.

A-

Emmys 2011: Nina Dobrev

Nina Dobrev in Donna Karan

I love a red dress on the red carpet. It's so very bold and glamorous. And this gown was no exception. I think the color looked fantastic on the Vampire Diaries star. Even if I do hate her for dating my fake bf Ian Somerholder. The dress fit her perfectly. Her hair was perfectly styled to accent the dress. And the folds, oh the folds!!!, in the skirt made me swoon. But I couldnt' shake the feeling that I'd seen it before. And my EWP catalog in my head quickly brought forth an image of another red dress on a red carpet, confirming that yes I had seen it before...

Eva Longoria at the 2009 Golden Globe Awards in Reem Acra.

Very similar, no? Right down to the clutch.

So while I did love Nina's look, it was so very 2009.

B